As the saying goes, "other people's opinions of you are none of your business."
Let that really sink in for a moment. Whether the opinions are good or bad is not our concern. What should matter is that we are living the way we feel is best.
Admittedly, it has taken me years to accept this because when I worked for a gym, I was hired to bring people in and keep them interested and engaged in the facility, therefore I had to constantly monitor my performace and adjust accordingly.
The problem with this people pleasing mindset is we often ignore our own instincts and try to be something or do something only to accomdate others. While this is good in some cases, think helping our children or friends, long term it can have a devasting effect on our personal energy and moral.
Recently I made my husband laugh out loud when I said during a philosophical conversation about life, "I really believe we are here to have a good time."
Peter burst out giggling at this thought as if to say ,"how could it be that the whole point is for us to simply be happy!" So I challenged him. "Okay, so then the point of life is to work non-stop?" He had to think about it and finally said, 'well no that is silly too."
I believe that we are supposed to do all we can to make the world a better place, helping our fellow humans any way we can. The key to sustaining this lifestyle lies in pursuing our passions, which gives us the energy we need but it can bring with it lots of judgment and critique from others.
Today in class I said, "be careful what you are good at because you could end up doing it for the rest of your life." Just because we are good at a certain job does not mean that we need to keep doing it if it makes us unhappy. There has to be balance between doing what lights us up inside and what brings in money to pay our bills, because the consequence can be poor health both mentally and physically.
Maybe the whole point is to prioritize our own voice over what others have to say and to take in only what aligns with our vision of ourselves and how we want to show up in the world. So while it sounds harsh to say that I no longer care what others think, it's true to the extent that I now see the importance of deflecting the opinions that don't serve me and my purpose in this life.
What do you think?
Beth